Wednesday, November 19, 2008


your relationship is my greatest fear realized.

samanthat jones of sex and the city said this on todays episode. it caught my attention taking it away from the crafts i was making (will post pictures later), and made me think.

its sad to say, but i couldnt agree more with sam..

some of my friends are in what i believe to be the weirdest of relationships. and yes, many of them, my biggest fears. but they arnt all the same type. thats, possibly, what scares me the most; relationships differ from couple to couple and i fear many, if not most, types of these relationships.

of course there are those who have been dating forever, get along all the time, never fight, finish each others sentences, and dedicate songs to one another. lovely. but is it real love? kind, patient, unadulterated, true love? maybe so. or maybe not. maybe its me being cynical, but i often think it is just one person giving everything up for the other. i mean can two people really agree on everything? and is that how a relationship should be? that dosent even sound like any fun. at what point do/should people push aside their own feelings, dreams, even mannerisms to please someone else? thats not what love is about, right? it irritates me.

i find it interesting, and disappointing, when relationships become bigger than the people involved. it happens a lot. it all begins to be more about whats next in societies opinion rather than how the individual couple feels. people take the next step without being ready to. so strange. i hope i always follow my heart instead of just trying to keep up with the relationship jones'. but i guess, whatever floats your love boat..

this type of relationship is my greatest fear realized.

on the opposite end of the spectrum, there are those who never want to settle into one relationship but instead spend their time playing the field and sleeping around. its both a risky and riskay way to live life. every month, these same people pray for their flow and hope to steer clear of the ghaneria. i have to admit, i loove the stories that come from these one night stands and random hook-ups. it happens to everyone. but it just seems to be so much funnier when it happens to others. it could be that they enjoy testing the waters. or maybe it is a fear of commitment. it could even be a "daddy issue." whatever it is, are they happy? do certain people enjoy waking up in a different bed every morning?

this type of relationship is my greatest fear realized.

some people spend all their time looking for love. all they want is to meet that special someone and call the end all be all of their love lives. they seem to be waiting to "start life" with another person but in the mean time, through the vigorous soul mate search, are there many opportunities that are being missed out on? imho, you cant hurry love. you really do just have to wait. it will happen when we are each ready. maybe mr./mrs. right have yet to come along because you still need to figure things out about yourself before someone else is thrown into the mix. i believe that all thing happen for a reason. even love. so why spend your time being desperate and even depressing? or are they just hopeful?

this type of relationship is my greatest fear realized.

so i wonder ..

does anyone realize that we live life through our experiences with the people we meet along the way? and doesnt settling down so early in life, or dating the same person all throughout college, limit many of these experiences? and will they look back with some regret, knowing that they stayed in on a saturday night to watch a movie or plan their wedding, just to avoid all the distractions from sexy, college singles at j's bistro? will they wonder what life would have been like if they had dated someone else, or no one at all?

and will the people who are out hunting pray each weekend at j's, look back and wonder what life would have been like if they had decided not to be such a commitment-phobe and decided to spend more time with that one person they always wondered about? would their time be better spent snuggling in bed with a certain someone you trust more than anyone?

who can say what the best route to take is? the world may never know. but i do know one things for sure; the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. and if you can find someone to love the you that you love, well, thats just fabulous.


  1. two very enthusiastic thumbs up. when did you get so damn deep?!

  2. umm I had so much to say-but for some reason my comment didn't post and what I had typed is gone. I'm peeved!

    I love this post!!

  3. 1. thank you! that means a lot coming from you! the hula girls were a surprise guest to everyone except for me, chelsea and jessica. it was a fun addition to the excitement leading up to the party, and it irritated my dad to the core to not know who the two guests were that would be spending the night at our house.
    2. a thank you you would get from chelsea i'm sure if you told her. not to sound conceited, but it gets said a lot lately.
    3. i don't know what hamster you're talking about, but i'm sure it's funny because the picture is funny
    4. haha jamie is so funny. aw i miss her.
    5. she signs cards and things as mommy roxy. we say it like momma roxy. so i never know what to write. i decided the way she writes it would be best for the blog. do forgive me.
    6. yes, yes, everything was themed. oh it was splendid.
    7. glad, it was hilarious. the pictures don't explain it at all close to the way it really happened. hilarious.
    i'm glad you enjoyed!!